MacGruber!!!

What happens when a big volcanic cloud of ash hovers over Europe and delays all flights - including that of the RAW superstars? Well, at least SmackDown! and NXT are around. And that means... wait. Vladimir Kozlov is here?! Oh-oh, bravo! I haven't seen him for, like, a year already. IMDB actually posted a photo of him and MacGruber trash-talking inside the ring. I was supposed to put it here but my hands got lazy. Anyway, I got really hooked watching the April 19th episode of RAW. My favorite part was when Kozlov called Jerry "The King" Lawler to read the speech he made for the New Jersey spectator. Just to make it clear, the following was read by Jerry Lawler. Every interjection is his; not Vlad's:

"I, Vladimir Kozlov, am protesting the unfair treatment I have received by the RAW guest host. I am an elite athlete, who demands elite competition. Uh, I don't expect any of you to understand. You are all... and these are your words, uh... you are all spoiled, ignorant Americans. You are, uh, you are physically inferior, therefore you are weak! Worst of all, you are in a state devoid of class or integrity. The single most depressing place on Earth, New Jersey. I cannot wait for my fellow Russian to buy your pathetic NBA franchise, the Nets, and move it out of this horrible state forever."

Also, I noticed Kozlov smile at least thrice (that's hard for him to do) - especially when King was reading his speech. MacGruber was more than happy to come out and wave the American flag right on Kozlov's face ("Nobody rips on the state of New Jersey!"). MacGruber also insulted Vlad's mother - a thing that led into Vladimir Kozlov uttering, "I will destroy you" under his breath, and an almost-brutal match later in that night. But that's a different story. Here are the other great things that happened on RAW:

• MacGruber distinguishing Kane as the "friend" who wet his pants.
• Chris Jericho singing "JERICHO!!!" (MacGruber theme) at the top of his lungs.
• Triple H being the only guy from RAW to have stayed in the US.
• CM Punk and Triple H exchanging bragging rights.
• This
• Khaluber!!!
• R-Truth getting pyroed.
• Jon Bon Jovi, Paul Blart Mall Cop, Snooki AND The Situation all making it to MacGruber's list of great, famous people from New Jersey.
• SmackDown! rosters helping out with the show.
• Randy Orton's twenty-second "live-via-satellite" cameo.
• Wade Barrett and Skip Sheffield's embarrassing "Rock 'em, Sock 'em" match. Whoops, wrong show.

The funny thing is that, RAW was so good that night - and all the RAW superstars weren't even around! Here's The Miz talking about it (too bad Bret Hart wasn't around to declare ShoMiz the Greatest Tag-Team in WWE history). We learned two things throughout this whole setting. Number one, we desperately need other SmackDown! superstars to get drafted to RAW. Number two, Chris Jericho also stars in MacGruber.

Don't miss the WWE Draft Lottery 2010 next week.